My heart is aching for something, though I don't even know what. The unknown possibility, the life I did not lead, the hope crushed on my sleeve.
If I close my eyes, I can picture a scene. A tall, lean build, laughter in his eyes, a dark blue sweater that fits him to perfection, dark jeans and a smile. I run into his arms, and I'm engulfed. I can feel his joy in the rumble of his chest against my face, the ways his arms tighten around me. I don't know who he is, but his eyes are the deepest, darkest color of the rainbow, rich and vibrantly hued.
Another unanswered prayer. A road that may have been, if one choice years ago had not been made, and my heart aches for its possibilities.
A world I'll never see, a life I'll never know. Winter in spring, and summer in fall. Autumn leaves torn from their grave and sprinkled over the snow. A smile, a laugh, and a promise. A sweet song of love and a kiss.
Be Ok - Ingrid Michaelson
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HeD86IT1Gl4
Valley Winter Song - Fountains of Wayne
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P9UXk1CXrUg
Showing posts with label dream. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dream. Show all posts
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Monday, November 17, 2008
Obviously.
Dark circles seem to be a permanent fixture on my face now.
I had a dream about C. last night. I dreamt that he came for me, as he once promised me he would. Silly, foolish girl. He's much too busy, and much too far away for that. I know this. Maybe in a year, when I move closer to him by necessity. But my new front yard seems to be a nice backdrop. Hm. I never thought I'd be dreaming about him. But it was nice. I wonder if I'll dream about him again. There's something to be said about seeing him, if only in my head.
It's amazing how I've only just recently realized that I'm a garrulous writer, so I wonder how many posts I will be putting up. Quite a few, I'm sure. Where else will I talk? C. is too busy for me. I think I have attachment issues. But that's okay, it's not stalker-like attachment. God knows I've experienced it myself, so I wouldn't want to wish that on someone else, much less at my own hands. *shudder* I think for me it's just a wistful, wishful attachment. "What could be" or some such line. I wonder, and I think, too often to focus. Oh well.
I had a dream about C. last night. I dreamt that he came for me, as he once promised me he would. Silly, foolish girl. He's much too busy, and much too far away for that. I know this. Maybe in a year, when I move closer to him by necessity. But my new front yard seems to be a nice backdrop. Hm. I never thought I'd be dreaming about him. But it was nice. I wonder if I'll dream about him again. There's something to be said about seeing him, if only in my head.
It's amazing how I've only just recently realized that I'm a garrulous writer, so I wonder how many posts I will be putting up. Quite a few, I'm sure. Where else will I talk? C. is too busy for me. I think I have attachment issues. But that's okay, it's not stalker-like attachment. God knows I've experienced it myself, so I wouldn't want to wish that on someone else, much less at my own hands. *shudder* I think for me it's just a wistful, wishful attachment. "What could be" or some such line. I wonder, and I think, too often to focus. Oh well.
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